Too Much Of A Good Thing
by sg-udjat
Summary: Summary: It is possible to have too much of a good thing.  Team fic, contains spoilers for episode 1x19 Tin Man.


**Too Much Of A Good Thing**

sg_udjat

Summary: It is possible to have too much of a good thing.

Originally posted online in December 1998. Spoilers for the Episode 1x19 'Tin Man'.

x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

"Unauthorised gate activation. Repeat, unauthorised gate activation."

The alert sounded throughout the Cheyenne Mountain complex, sending people scurrying for their posts. In the control room the technician on duty was joined by General Hammond. Glancing quickly through the window to make sure the iris was closed, he turned to the technician.

"Any idea who's activated the gate." Hammond's tone was impatient.

"No sir, no remote iris code has been received yet. Wait….there's a radio transmission coming through."

"Put it on the speaker." Hammond waited to hear the message.

Through the static he recognised the voice of Daniel Jackson. "Stargate Command, this is Daniel Jackson." He was shouting and panic filled his voice. "The replica Daniel Jackson that is…"

"Daniel, get on with it! I can't hold them back much longer!" Sam Carter's shout came from the speaker.

"We need help, we're being over-run. Harlan can't stop them. Jack is…." In a burst of static Daniel's panicked transmission was cut off, as the wormhole shut down.

Hammond looked at the technician who stared back with wide eyes. "Recall SG-1 from leave. I want them here ASAP."

x

SG-1 sat around the table in the briefing room and eyed each other curiously. The soldiers sent to retrieve them had been extremely literal in their interpretation of their orders. The various members of SG-1 had been located and brought straight back to Cheyenne Mountain, with no time to stop off and change.

Daniel had been hauled off a student dig in the mountains, and was tired, dirty and dusty. Carter had been visiting her brother and had been dragged away from baby-sitting duties. O'Neill tried unsuccessfully not to snigger at the lemon dungarees complete with embroidered flowers. The addition of several finger painted designs on the fabric only added to the effect. O'Neill himself had been in the middle of an ice hockey game, and sat now in his bare feet having finally managed to take his skates off. Teal'c sat to one side, dressed in a black T-shirt and combat trousers. The sombre effect was ruined only by the sheriff's badge pinned to his chest and the half-full water gun now resting by his chair.

"At ease, people." Hammond walked into the room and sat down. Without any preamble he played the recording back and watched SG-1 carefully for reactions.

When it finished O'Neill was the first to speak. "Jack is…...what?" He looked at Hammond.

"That was all we received, Colonel. There have been no further attempts at communication."

"Obviously they need help." O'Neill looked at the rest of the team for support, and they nodded in agreement.

"I thought that you'd say that, Colonel. We sent a MALP through to try and make a threat determination. This is what we got back."

The monitor flickered and a recording of the MALP feed was played back. They recognised the surroundings of the Gate, but what drew their attention was the figure of Jack O'Neill lying on the floor. A short iron bar protruded from his chest.

"Ah," O'Neill's voice was cool, "Jack is…dead…deactivated…whatever."

Teal'c glanced over at him. "I was disintegrated," His voice carried a faint tone of disapproval, "but Harlan was able to make another."

O'Neill sighed, was Teal'c ever going to stop going on about that? "Give it a rest, Teal'c. 'You' were trying to smash 'my' head in with an iron bar."

"Where's everyone else?" Daniel was alternating his glance from the screen to the real O'Neill.

"More to the point, what's happened there?" Carter looked at the image intently, trying to see if any of the replica's internal wiring had been exposed.

"Permission to take a team through, sir."

"Granted, Colonel. Be careful."

x

Hammond paced the control room impatiently. SG-1 had been gone for six hours and there was still no word. Seeing that he was making the technician nervous he decided to wait in his office. Another forty minutes went by until he heard the announcement of incoming travellers.

The technician nodded as she saw him coming down the stairs. "SG-1's signal, sir."

He looked expectantly towards the Stargate and was relieved when he saw O'Neill appear. His relief turned to confusion when he was followed by….O'Neill! And another. And another. Soon there were five O'Neill's stood on the ramp, when suddenly Carter appeared, followed by Teal'c, Daniel and another eleven O'Neill's and another Carter, Teal'c and Daniel!

Hammond knew he spoke for everyone when he said, "!"

The two Carter's looked at each other and both quickly ran down the ramp shouting instructions, "Shut it down, close the iris!" As the iris spiralled closed, several thuds could be heard before the wormhole disengaged. Hammond made his way down to the Gate room, and confronted the massed group of people standing before the Stargate.

"Just what the hell is going on here?" He looked in confusion at the group of O'Neills. One of the Carter's stepped forward.

"Recommend you place all of the O'Neill's in confinement, sir. We'll explain at the de-briefing."

"OK, Captain." He turned to the O'Neills. "Who is the real Colonel O'Neill?"

"I am."

"No, you're not. I am."

"Oh, for cryin' out loud, anyone can tell it's me."

Hammond closed his eyes as the chorus of claims, counter-claims and accusations continued. Feeling a headache starting he quickly called out instructions. "Airmen, escort Colonel O'Neill - all of them - to the holding room."

"Except this Colonel O'Neill." Carter snagged the arm of one of the O'Neill's who was being forcibly dragged out of the Gateroom.

Hammond could see no difference, "And why is that, Captain?"

Carter silently pointed out the blood staining the back of O'Neill's neck. At Hammond's questioning glance she shrugged, "I lost track of who the real Colonel O'Neill was and hit the wrong one, sir."

Hammond rubbed his own neck in sympathy, he could personally attest to Carter's ability and enthusiasm when it came to knocking people out. "OK, people, briefing room. Now."

The sound of the protesting and complaining O'Neill's could be heard down the corridor as everyone made their way up to the briefing room.

x

The replica Carter, Daniel and Teal'c sat on one side of the table, opposite SG-1. The two groups eyed each other in interest, trying the spot the differences. The sound of Hammond clearing his throat drew their attention back to the General. "I'm waiting, Colonel."

"Yessir. Well, erm." He sighed heavily, "Carter, can explain it best, sir."

The real Carter nodded towards the replica who then began telling the sorry tale. "Our Colonel O'Neill was...'injured'... during an off world visit..."

"Offworld. I thought the Gate was sealed after SG-1 left." Hammond glared at the replicas.

"Apparently they unsealed it, sir." O'Neill's comment did nothing to diffuse the tension.

"And 'I' designed a portable power pack, one that can be recharged by solar power." Carter looked proudly at her replica as she spoke. "That means that we can stay away from the base power supply indefinitely."

Hammond shook his head and turned his attention back to the replica Carter, "Proceed."

"The damage was too severe, Harlan had to...deactivate him." O'Neill winced. "Harlan thought that he would be able to make a new O'Neill as he had the records of the previous replica still stored in the machine. But something went wrong, instead of just making one, the machine went on to make a copy of the copy, and then a copy of the copy of the copy, and so on. And of course as you make copies of copies..."

"Errors creep in and get magnified."

"Exactly. each copy produced was gradually more distorted from the original."

"Couldn't you just turn the machine off?"

"We tried. But by the time we realised what was happening, there were already ten or so O'Neills in existence. They wouldn't let us get near the machine."

Everybody around the table watched in bemusement as the two Carter's discussed the problem between themselves. As they both paused for breath, Daniel took up the story.

"Each new Jack thought he was the original. The later copies became progressively more aggressive and paranoid. They began attacking the earlier copies and destroying them." He shook his head in remembrance. "Weird is not the word to describe how that looked."

"Yeah, weird." O'Neill still had come to terms with seeing various versions of himself lying dead around every corner, killed in an astonishingly wide variety of ways. He had to admit that 'he' certainly was inventive when it came to killing people. And apparently that old saying of being able to kill someone with a paperclip...it was true.

"What do we do with these replicas?" Hammond pointed to the monitor which displayed the video feed from the holding room. Everyone looked at the screen in silence. Some O'Neills were lying in the bunks, some were sat around the table, several were stood arguing in the corner, some were stood by the door hammering on it and yelling for the guard and one was climbing up to push his face into the camera and yell at the microphone, "Get me the hell outta here."

The replica Teal'c finally spoke, "We must destroy all the O'Neills."

"Teal'c's right, O'Neills are later copies, they are highly unstable." Carter agreed with Teal'c's brief assessment of the situation.

Hammond frowned in confusion, "If they're so unstable, then why did you bring them back with you?"

"Ah, we didn't, or at least not intentionally," Daniel looked slightly embarrassed. " We were running back to the gate..."

"We were making a tactical withdrawal, sir." O'Neill clarified their actions, putting the correct military interpretation to them.

"….when we opened the gate they rushed us, and some got through."

Hammond nodded in understanding, he could believe that the sight of twenty plus O'Neills pounding towards you was enough to make anyone freeze to the spot.

"OK, people, I need to think about this. Dismissed." Hammond rose from the table, and rubbing his head he walked towards his office.

"What do we do now?" The replica's looked at each other.

"We wait." O'Neill calmly leaned back in his chair and looked over at the replicas. "You can fill us in on what's been happening."

x

As it was they didn't have to wait very long. Only twenty five minutes had passed when an alarm suddenly sounded and General Hammond's voice came over the tannoy. "All personnel be on the look-out for Colonel O'Neill. There are approximately fifteen impostors who have escaped from confinement. Apprehend on sight. This is a level six alert."

After making the announcement the General stalked back into the room.

"How did they escape, sir?"

"I don't know, Captain. One of the O'Neills was continually shouting at the camera, and blocked the view of the holding room. When the guards didn't report in on time the Major went down there. Both guards were unconscious and the door had been forced open. All he found inside were these." He held out his hand which contained some chewing gum wrappers, a few bent hair pins and an empty matchbook cover.

There was a brief commotion as Major Jameson ran into the room, "Sir, we're getting reports of Colonel O'Neill impostors have attacked the guards on sub-levels 18 through 11. They've taken their weapons." The Major spoke breathlessly, and continually dabbed at a heavily bleeding cut over one eye.

Hammond's face turned grim, "They're heading for the surface. We cannot allow him...them...to escape. The Joint Chiefs agree, these replicas must be destroyed." He turned back to O'Neill, "Colonel, I will have to ask you to remain in my office for the duration of this exercise. Teal'c will stay with you, it's the only way we can be sure that it's the real you."

"Hm," Daniel looked thoughtful, "How do we know that **this** is the real Jack? Any of them could have put a bandage on their neck."

"Good point." Carter was sat on the other side of O'Neill. There was a slight pause as everyone stared at O'Neill.

"Well, I can assure you that it is me...owwwwwww!" O'Neill yelped as Carter stabbed a pin into his hand.

She smiled in satisfaction at the drops of blood which appeared. "Just wanted to make sure, Colonel."

"Carter!"

"Better safe than sorry, sir." There was no hint of apology in her voice.

x

"Attention all personnel. The Colonel O'Neill impostors are to be detained on sight, they must not be allowed to leave this facility. The use of lethal force is authorised. Repeat, the use of lethal force is authorised. " It appeared to O'Neill that General Hammond took a certain amount of relish in that order. "Colonel, make sure you lock the door behind you. Let's go snipe hunting, people."

x

O'Neill had a feeling that the events he witnessed that day would result in him making several visits to the base shrink. He watched on the monitors as the SGC set about destroying the replicas.

"This is just too weird." He looked over at Teal'c who was watching the monitors in interest.

Turning back to look at the screen, he cringed and winced as Carter fought with an O'Neill. Finally she managed to drop kick him to the ground and smash his head in with the butt of her rifle. As she stood panting over the twitching body she grinned widely and the voice pick up caught her muttered comment. "Take back an all male team indeed!"

Another monitor caught Daniel Jackson as he leapt round a corner, and with a passable Marine battle cry he fired a burst of automatic weapon fire towards a crouching O'Neill. As it fell to the ground in a shower of sparks Daniel strode forward, "Respect me now, Jack? Try interrupting that!"

Teal'c was battling an O'Neill in the main power vault. The replica had been trying to cut power to the surveillance equipment when Teal'c had found him. With a heave Teal'c threw O'Neill onto the live panel, and as the charred and smoking figure fell to the ground he said just one word. "Oops."

The real O'Neill looked over at the real Teal'c, who had observed this on the monitor. For an instant he thought he saw a fleeting smile on Teal'c's face.

The other Carter could be seen stalking an O'Neill down a corridor, as the replica opened a panel by the elevator shaft she let out a whooping scream. Diving towards O'Neill she wrestled him to the ground and straddled his chest. Raising her knife above her head she plunged it down into the replicas power supply. "And I adore you too! Sayonara, baby!"

There was a melee going on near the armoury, General Hammond, Daniel and some airmen were fighting with six O'Neills. General Hammond smashed his rifle into a replica O'Neill's face, obviously taking great delight in doing so. "Have a little problem following orders, do we?" He was grabbed from behind by another O'Neill and spun round. Dodging the fist aimed at his face he lowered his head and charged, ramming the replica in the stomach. They both fell to the ground and O'Neill was shot by a burst of gunfire from one of the airmen. Another airman was repeatedly ramming the head of another O'Neill against the wall, until it collapsed in a mangled heap. With a demented cry of "Here's Danny!" Daniel leapt onto the back of another O'Neill and began twisting his head round. The replica lurched back, smashing Daniel against the wall. As Daniel fell to the ground he tried to pull O'Neill down after him, but the replica dodged out of the way. Launching a vicious kick to Daniel's face he smashed it in, and the replica Daniel fell back to the ground with a sad sqwaurk and a shower of sparks. Back handing Hammond, O'Neill bent down to pick up the rifle and was almost cut in half by the burst of automatic gunfire from the two airmen remaining on their feet. The two remaining O'Neills took off down the corridor, hotly pursued by the airmen.

x

Eventually all the replicas had been destroyed or deactivated. The watching O'Neill was dismayed by the unexpected enthusiasm his own team had displayed in destroying the replicas. For some reason, he had foolishly thought that they might find it difficult.

With Teal'c accompanying him he went back into the meeting room to await the return of General Hammond, SG-1 and the surviving replicas. he nodded at them as they entered, laughing and talking loudly amongst themselves. He got a perverse pleasure from seeing the bruises and other injuries that the replica O'Neill's had inflicted. Carter came over and sat down next to him and he turned to talk to her. "Sam, what did you mean...oowwwwwww!" He sucked his hand where Carter had stabbed him with the pin again.

"Just making sure, sir." She tried to sound apologetic this time, but her laughter-filled eyes ruined the effect.

"For cryin'' out loud, Carter! Would you stop doing that."

Daniel sat down in his chair and sighed happily, his eyes glinting behind his glasses. "Jack, you have no idea how therapeutic that was." His face clouded for an instant when he noticed that the replica Daniel was missing, but then he grinned again. If necessary he could go back and let Harlan make another copy of him.

"Oh, I think I can make a good guess." O'Neill's sour comment only made the others laugh. He turned back to Carter. "Sam, you're not still uptight about that incident with the Shavadai are you?"

She grinned at him devilishly, "Not anymore, sir."

Hammond called the meeting to order. "OK, people, we've dealt with the problem at this end. All the replicas have been neutralised, with minimum casualties on our side. There are six people in the infirmary with injuries ranging from broken bones to concussion. We now need to address the problem at source."

O'Neill leant forward, "Why don't we just..."

"DESTROY THE MACHINE." Everyone around the table chorused the words together.

O'Neill shrugged and raised an eyebrow. "Kinda works for me."

The replica Carter shook her head. "Harlan's still back there, he's trying to control the situation. We just need to shut the machine down and repair it. Then we can sort everything out, after all the place is our home now."

"After you've got rid of all the O'Neills."

O'Neill frowned at the General's words. "I'd rather you didn't refer to me like an bug infestation, sir."

Carter patted him sympathetically on the arm. "Don't worry, Colonel. We'll try to make it as quick and painless as possible."

Hammond began speaking again as O'Neill shot Carter a slight, strained grin. "Due to the number of...er, hostiles...on the planet, I have asked SG teams 3, 5, 8 and 11 to join us for the next stage." The named teams crowded into the room and stood around the walls. "Due to the nature of the task, this mission is on a strictly volunteer basis only..." Hammond's voice ground to a halt as all but one person in the room thrust their hand into the air to indicate their desire to be chosen. O'Neill put his head in his hand and groaned.

"Obviously Colonel, you cannot go on this mission." Hammond waited for the inevitable protest from O'Neill, but the only reply he got was a grunt.

"Don't worry, sir. I think I'm going to be busy."

"Doing what, Colonel?"

"Having a nice little chat with the shrink, sir." O'Neill got up and walked out of the briefing room as everyone began discussing tactics for taking down an O'Neill.

As O'Neill disappeared Carter looked over at the General, "You did rescind the lethal force order, didn't you sir?"

As one they both stood up and ran for the door. "COLONEL!"

THE END


End file.
